This post is from contributor, Stacey Lane
There is no better way to battle entitlement than not having the funds to say “yes.”
Over the years it has kept me in check. I love my kids and want to give them everything and not allow anything bad to happen to them, but oh the lessons I would be keeping them from.
It is difficult at times; I want to say, “yes” to fun toys, spur-of-the-moment field trips, and eating out. But the budget does not allow for all these things.
My kids understand where the money goes that is earned in this house. I remember when my oldest son was around 7 years old. The power went out and he came running into the living room yelling, “Send more money to the electric company, our lights are off.” I had to explain our bill was paid in full but there were other reasons for the lights to be off.
When my kids question why their friends all have cell phones, popular electronics, or the newest toys, my questions get to the heart of the matter. Are you comparing your stuff to theirs? Are you coveting? Do you know how hard they may have had to work for that item? Does everyone “really” have the newest iPhone? If you think you need a certain item then write up a budget for how you are going to earn and save for it.
When the grumbling starts about chicken again for dinner, I give them a budget for the next week’s meals. I explain how I am cutting back to pay off a medical bill that month and give them a dollar amount to spend to feed the family. Then I take them shopping. Now I have the chance for them to scour the store for sales and choose how to creatively spend their money. I give suggestions and point out where the discounted day-old bread is sold.
I have learned to love my strict budget which allows me to teach the kids how to live on less. Now I have the joy of watching them budget their money. A great example: my oldest son saved and worked all summer so he could work limited hours while at college.
How do you battle “entitlement” with your children.
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That works, right up to the point that your (doing-pretty-well-for-themselves) parents take over, and give the kids everything they want anyways. Then you get your 8yo begging for you to let him live with Grannie and Grandad. :/