This post is from contributor, Emily Powers.
She huffs and puffs as she scrubs the bathtub – it just never looks clean enough. She arranges the furniture exactly so, to cover up that awful stain on the carpet. She sighs as the utensil drawer falls off the hinges again, spilling silverware across the floor. She internally cringes when her guests bring up the chipping countertop, or sticking doorknobs, or missing siding…
So you don’t live in your dream home? I don’t either. My husband is a pastor and we live in a parsonage. In case you aren’t sure what that means – a parsonage is a house that the church provides for their pastor and family. It is a huge blessing and I truly love our home. But, it is not my dream home – not by a long shot. And as a pastor’s wife, I have had to face the reality that I may never live in my dream home.
Our current home has a very outdated kitchen, ugly blue carpet in the living room, and only one functioning bathroom. We have painted rooms, ripped up carpet, and laid a new kitchen floor during our three and a half years in this house – but with a husband working a full-time job on top of being a pastor, and living on a very conservative budget, I have had to accept the many blemishes in our home. Also, because we live in a parsonage, we must get approval from the church for any major projects. Thus, if it is not necessary for living – it is not a priority.
{Our kitchen – before we laid a new floor}
I will admit that I have had a bad attitude at times – wishing I had a dishwasher, or a second bathroom, or a laundry room that wasn’t in the farthest musty corner of our basement. But God has taught me about being content with where I am and what I have been given.
“I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.” Philippians 4:12
As homeschoolers, this is especially true. It can be easier to become discontent when you are not only living, but schooling in your home as well. I find the most positive way to deal with living in a “not-so dream” home is to make the best of what you have. God created women with the gift and ability to create beauty in our surroundings {read more on that subject here}. So get creative and have fun!
Here are five ways that I have attempted to do just that >
– Paint. Paint is a pretty inexpensive and easy way to spruce up a room and/or home. To make our living room even more exciting (and detract from the blue carpet) we painted one wall blue and one wall tan. That brings me to my next point…
– Work with it. Don’t fight against the things you cannot change. I remember the first day we viewed our home, I peeled back a corner of the blue carpet in the living room to find only sub-flooring – it was heartbreaking! We knew that there was no option of taking up that carpet or replacing it and so I would have to work with it. I began to slowly pick up pieces at yard sales that would coordinate with the carpet.
– Rugs. Area rugs can be your best friend if you dislike your flooring. I found this area rug {pictured above} at a discount store for only $19.99 {normally $60.00}. Rugs can also help give the room a style and flavor.
– Make it Cozy. Adding cozy furniture to your home will make it feel inviting and warm. Lighting candles or burning oil, offering yummy treats and playing soft music really creates a cozy atmosphere in your home. People will be less likely to notice the “blemishes” your home has if they are comfortable and enjoying fellowship.
– Keep it tidy. I am not saying that you need to have a spotless home – but when your home is older and has some “issues” – clutter and chaos can magnify all those problems. Keeping a tidy home and the clutter to a minimum will help you and your family feel more relaxed – the goal is to enjoy your home regardless of its wear and tear.
knowledge its rooms are filled with rare and beautiful treasures.”
Proverbs 24:3-4
We are preparing to move into a new parsonage {at a new church} that is smaller than our current home and will need some work – so God is reminding me of His provision and goodness. I am learning each day to be more content…because I have everything I need.
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Before I was a work from home mom, I worked in the fashion industry. I used to complain about make so much money but because I lived in NYC, I could not afford much. I complained about my small apartment and the long 50+ hours a week + a 1 hour each way commute. Then I had a business trip in the the Ukraine and the people were so poor that even though they worked, they could not afford the bus fair home so they slept on the cutting tables and went home on the weekend. The workers were very clean but after being there for a week, I noticed that everyone only had 1 or 2 changes of clothes. It was then that I had to thank God that I could afford to go home to a comfy bed even though I did not get home until 11:00 or 12:00am. I could change up my clothes even if they were not the designer duds everyone else seemed to be wearing. We have so much to be thankful for. Many people around the world would love to have what we might think is small or raggedy.
Great post! Thank you! I can relate! God called my family to a different state do my hubby can Pursue his calling as a pastor and we had to move into a MUCH smaller home than before and much older. We are very squashed and it does look cluttered but I don’t know how to fix that yet… I’ve given up so much stuff!! I have kind of given up and stopped unpacking and trying to organize, I did it for 3 straight weeks. I guess now I need to get on it again and finish it up! Thank you for sharing!
Thank you, this was very encouraging! 🙂
Thank you for this post! I am constantly having a hard time being content with our home and I verbalize this! Not good at all!!! I see my kids have the same attitude towards their objects and it breaks my heart. I am going to turn my attitude around, starting today! I am also going to bookmark this post so I can come back to it time and time again! Thank you! 🙂
This is such a timely post for me as I’ve been getting antsy about our little apartment! Now, on to learn more about creating beauty (definitely not a natural inclination for me!). 😉
Thank you for sharing your Godly, biblical perspective! It’s soooooo refreshing……and encouraging!
Thank you so much for this post! I Really needed it today. Our home was built in 1940 and has only one bathroom, is on the small size and storage is limited. Trying to homeschool in a home with little storage space is very hard. We are certainly NOT in our dream home, but I am doing my best to be content with what we have. We are on our second special needs adoption (third child to be adopted) and knowing that by sacrificing my wants and desires of a dream home that would cost us more for a mortgage it allows us to open our doors a children who would otherwise not have a home. Our current adoption is for a little 12 year old with Down syndrome. If I had my dream home, the expenses we would have in just paying bills would take away any chance we would have of being able to afford to add to our family through the blessing of adoption. Thank you, and God Bless!
Very good timing with this post! I’ve been so unhappy with our apartment. We can’t do anything much (even curtains won’t stay up), and it’s so small a couch doesn’t even fit. But this post is a good reminder that we’re being taught to be content with what we have, not what we want. Thank you.
Finding this blog post is very timely. I believe a God thing! I’m about to move from a beautiful new and up to date home to base housing built in the 60’s. I’m excited to move as the blessings are going to be huge, but, I’m going to miss this home. It’s the newest and biggest home I’ve ever had the privilege to live in. It’s hard seeing this chapter close. While I’m excited to move, I’m hesitant because the new place is smaller and much older.
Thank you for sharing! I’m going to peruse more of your blog as I put off packing. Lol
Thanks for sharing, Ebony. It is always good to put our life into perspective and realize how fortunate we are. Blessings 🙂
Stephanie, we moved shortly after I wrote this post – so I can relate to you! We had a yard sale, donated stuff and even just threw some things away – and I still have a room full of “storage” boxes that I need to go through 🙂 It is a challenge, but I believe that God is stretching me in my faith by moving into a smaller home – I am learning to let go of material things and be more conscious of what we really need!
Contentment is something I am still working on, Erin – I had to stop watching HGTV! 😀 I have realized that I have to choose to see the blessings in my life no matter what my physical circumstances 😉
What a wonderful example you are to your family by making those sacrifices! What you are doing is eternally more valuable than the largest most beautiful mansion here on this earth. Blessings to you 🙂
Annie,
I understand what you are going through – I grew up on military bases! We just transitioned to our new home, and while I was very excited about it, I was nervous about the house because it was smaller. I truly love our new home, though. It is still not my “dream” home – but it is the home that I hope will house my dreams for a very long time 🙂
Thank you for the post! It’s the perfect reminder! You’ve made your house a beautiful home 😉
I like that last bit about the home that houses your dreams! I need to remember that!!
We have been living in a rent free old farm house for the last couple years which is only 750 sq ft. We are a family of 11 so there is very little room to move. We were blessed with this place as we ended up homeless for a short time and a lady in our church blessed us with her house she no longer lived in. My husband is waiting to have back surgery and can not work right now. Contentment is hard, very hard. This is FAR from our dream anything. It is sometimes a daily battle to be thankful in our situation. We see our blessings, don’t get me wrong, but those blessing are drowning in a sea of hell. We do what we can to make this place feel like home but this is a temporary place and do not know how long we’ll be allowed to stay here. This has been a hard road for us and even a harder road for the kids. Praying daily to see our blessing and not dwell on the negative.
I just wanted to reply and say that my heart goes out to you. We lived in a rather run down and old farm house too. It was even harder because I know the history of the house (incontinent cats, a room dedicated to being garbage dump and a room dedicated to being a litter box, hadn’t been cleaned in over 5 years, even though it was lived in etc). It was hard. We lived there for about 4.5 years and, even though we looked at the blessings, it was still hard.
I figure it was God’s way of showing me that if I could make that house a home and care for it to the best of my ability, I could make any place a home. I think the hardest part for me was that it didn’t have an “end date.” We have since moved into a smaller and just as old home that has been kept up better. Still not my dream home (I’m working on plans and savings for that one!) but contentment is finding us.
I hope that your husband gets his surgery soon and recovers well so that you are able to make some plans for the future, whatever they may be. And I’ve sent up a prayer for you that you have more content days than hard ones. Keep praying because God has already overcome your situation and has a plan for your family. Keep praying and clinging to Him!
You hit the nail on the head when you mentioned HGTV for me. We don’t have cable and access to HGTV, but while on vacation recently we had access to it and it definitely affects the thoughts I have about my home. We came back wanting to redo everything. And we positively do not have the funds for those ventures. Little by little, with no debt to incur and saving here and there for things is the only way. Besides, what fun is it if everything is perfect anyway?? 🙂 Work in progress here, both in my home and in myself. Praying we all are able to be content with such things as we’ve been blessed with!