Single Mom Homeschooling
Her words cut deep in the midst of my pain. Betrayal had been uncovered and my family was turned upside down. My friend wanted to help, but in her own desperation, she couldn’t see past the circumstances. “I guess you will have to put your kids in school,” she proclaimed. I stared blankly into her face. Not really sure what to say, yet at the same time knowing that many others would say these same words to me. My husband hadn’t even packed a suitcase and yet conclusions were being drawn about my children’s educational future. Fear of the unknown swirled violently through my head as I listened to her pleas to put them in school.
But God was already stirring in my heart. He wasn’t surprised by what had happened in my family and He was whispering a plan that was full of redemption. There were really only two things to consider. First, I knew that God had called me to homeschooling. I had done so since the beginning and while many days were challenging, it was the right educational choice for my family. Second, I knew that putting 4 kids in day care was hardly going to offset the benefit of any salary that I might earn outside of the home.
So, the clothes went in the suitcase and I headed to the homeschool convention that I had already paid for.
I roamed the halls searching for someone that was wearing a giant t-shirt that read- I’m a single mom and I homeschool! I longed for someone that could relate. Someone who knew what it was like to sit in the seat and cringe when the speaker warned of how the father’s leadership would make or break your home. I spent more time in the bathroom wiping tears than I did taking notes on how to be a better math teacher for my kids, but I was proud that I went. It was faith that moved my feet into that conventional hall and trust in God that kept me from running.
The one thing I never wanted to be now haunted my every decision. I was a single mom. I longed to be one of the many mommas leading around a host of little ones while carting another on my back. I wanted to bake bread and buy my own goat. Instead, I sat at the head of the dinner table, empty and too tired to lead that family devotional that I had purchased. I longed for the perfect homeschool and that glorious dream of serving God together as a family.
Have you been there, friend? Lost in the fog of destruction and despair, listening to the doom spoken into your homeschool? Have you bought the lies that you aren’t good enough to educate your children? Have you felt called to the mission of homeschooling only to find yourself in a very lonely place?
I have. For nearly 3 years, I have homeschooled my children, as a single mom. *gasp* I know, right? Can you imagine? And I know a dozen other moms who have done it longer than I have. Friend, the truth is, you can totally do this. No, it isn’t easy. But let’s face it. There isn’t one easy day as a single mom. It’s more difficult to make dinner, do the laundry, and even sleep at night. Everything is harder when there is no one to help you. Putting your kids in school doesn’t suddenly lift a burden that is meant to be filled by your husband. Nothing will. The laundry will still pile in mountains higher than we can bear to face. The dishes will still demand scrubbing and little teary faces will still need to be wiped.
If you are a single mom who wants to homeschool, be encouraged friend. You can do this. God will equip you for what He called you to do (Eph 4:12). In His strength, this can be done. One thing I am sure of…I will never regret investing my time into my children. No 401K or $100 dress will ever replace the value of speaking God’s truth into their souls. Even if it means that we eat beans more nights of the week than I would prefer.
Looking for homemaking tips? I’ve got those, too: 5 days of Husbandless Homemaking
**This post was originally published in Sept. 2012.**
Kim is just a girl, crazy in love with Jesus. She’s a single mother of 4, a passionate homeschooler and life-long student. After teaching 8 years in public school, she traded her M.A. in Early Childhood for sippy cups and homeschool co-ops.
When she’s not homeschooling, organizing, or folding cloth diapers, Kim blogs at Not Consumed, where she encourages others to rest victoriously in the hands of God, rather than allowing life’s difficult circumstances to consume. Kim would be honored to meet you. Please stop by her blog Not Consumed or connect with her on Facebook. Single moms are welcome to join her group Home{schooling} Alone, where you will find support and encouragement.
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I am also a single mom homeschooler. I adopted my sons as a single mother almost 5 years ago. I have never been married, so I don’t know any other way but single motherhood. But I am also hereto attest that it is very possible. I happen to work from home, but I know other single homeschoolers who work full time.
Oh Kim I wish you could have seen my face when I read the first part of this! I am also a mother of 4 and had the very same conversations with everyone when he left. Everywhere I turned for help that was always the first suggestion…..public school will save the day! Then to turn to the homeschool community for help and hear over and over how the FATHER sets the tone for success or failure! There were days when I didn’t think I could get out of bed. He left us broke, homeless, car less, and at a homeless shelter……that was almost 2 years ago. We haev a roof over our head , a wonderful Church home, many activities, 2 co-ops we are a part of and my best friend who makes homeschooling possible for me! God has a plan and if you just listen and follow you will be rewarded more than your heart can ever imagine!!! Thank you Kim for this article……it means the world to mom’s like us 🙂
Thanks for sharing your story, Jennifer. God is so amazingly faithful to provide for us! That is so evident in your life! I hope that you have joined my Facebook group. I would love to get to know you!
Thank you for sharing your story. There are so many unique situations and so many unique ways that God provides for them. I love hearing it! Blessings, friend!
God bless you dear sister! Thanks to the Lord (really, it’s been a very tough 19 years) I am still married to my husband but I wanted to tell you how encouraging your testimony of God’s provision is. I know the sting of those words, “Put the children in public school.” when deep inside you know you’re CALLED to this. We had elders and deacons at a previous church who offered public school up as the first solution to our financial struggles. It’s not just single moms who get that message but I know it must be louder and more often for you. When He calls, He equips! Praise Him!
Hi, I just wanted to send some encouragement to all the single mother homeschoolers out there. I was the oldest daughter of a single homeschool mum (my father passed away). She chose to stay at home and homeschool myself and two younger siblings all the way through school. I’m sure that it wasn’t easy for her but choosing to stay at home with me was one of the biggest gifts. As for not having a Father to set the tone for the home, my Mum always taught us that God had promised to be a Father to the Fatherless and I believe that he gave us extra grace as a family. My siblings and I are all in our 20’s now, well adjusted, loving and serving God and successful in further education. I am now starting to homeschooling my first child and looking forward to the journey ahead.